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Broken Promises - Short Story by Jennie E. Furr
April 1790
Barnabas had just retired to his room for the evening when the
first timid knock sounded at his door; it was so quiet that anyone else
might not have noticed it, but Barnabas had been expecting his sister.
Sarah always came to his room before she went to bed to ask him to read
her a bedtime story. It was their special, private time and he had
realized long ago that it made the
twilight his favorite time of the day. What he didn't expect to see when
he opened the door was Sarah standing there with tears streaming down
her face, her favorite doll hanging limply from her tiny hand. She
immediately reached out for him and he picked her up, holding her
tightly as she sobbed against his shoulder.
"What's wrong, darling," he whispered, stroking her hair as she
cried, trying to ease the fear that had taken such a strong hold of her.
"I heard Mother and Father fighting earlier, and when I went to
tell Mother goodnight, she wouldn't wake up. Father says she's just
sleeping, but I'm still scared."
"It's alright, little one. Your mother isn't feeling well right
now, but she's going to be fine. She just needs to rest. Let me take you
to your room." He picked her up and carried her down the long, dark
hallway, amazed that it had been five years since Sarah had become such
an important part of his life; it certainly didn't seem like it had been
that long. It still felt like it was only yesterday that he and the rest
of the family had eagerly awaited Sarah's arrival; they had all been
amazed at the miracle of her birth, even his father, and Barnabas had
known when he held her for the first time that she was the most perfect
gift he'd ever been given. Eventually, though, the euphoria that all new
babies bring into the world with them faded and his parents had begun to
drift apart. His mother had retreated into her private world of pain and
grief, destroying her life with alcohol, and his father had let his
anger and frustration overwhelm him. The family had fallen apart, and
everyone spent their time fighting and name-calling when they should
have seen how it was affecting Sarah.
When Barnabas reached Sarah's room, he turned back the bed and
gently nestled her into the warm blankets, only leaving her long enough
to light several candles. Sitting beside her and holding her close, he
hummed the tune of an almost-forgotten lullaby as he watched the pale
candlelight cast flickering shadows on the wall. It seemed as though an
eternity passed before
Sarah stopped sobbing and she looked up at Barnabas, her luminous brown
eyes reflecting her trust and love for her brother, and the unspoken
questions no child should have to ask. He felt helpless when he
considered what he should and shouldn't tell her; the family had denied
that Naomi was sick from the beginning, as if not acknowledging her
excessive drinking would somehow make her problems go away. That had
made it easier to shield Sarah from the truth but she had witnessed
their parents' arguments and had been the target of her father's anger
one too many times to believe Barnabas when he told her everything was
alright. But where did he draw the line between the truth and protecting
her innocence? She was, after all, just a child...
"Barnabas," she whispered, her voice suddenly cutting through the
oppressive silence surrounding them, "I know Mama is really sick, she's
not...going to...die is she?" Her words broke his heart, but Barnabas was
careful to keep his emotions under control to keep from frightening her
any further.
"No, Sarah, I promise you your mother is going to be alright. She
needs our love and support to help her get well, but I won't let her leave you."
"Really? You promise?"
"Now, Sarah, I've never let you down before have I?"
"No Barnabas, you haven't." She smiled up at him, a sweet smile
which always made Barnabas feel at peace with his life, regardless of
how hopeless things seemed for him; wiping away her tears, he wished
that he could take away her pain and fear just as easily, but instead,
all he could do was hold her hand as she said her prayers, and try to
reassure her that once morning came,
everything would be back to normal. She asked for her favorite story, one
that he had made up her when she had been confined to her bed with a
fever earlier that year, and as his words wove the story of Princess
Sarah and her adventures in a faraway castle, he saw a faint glimmer of
happiness in his sister's eyes. At least this moment could help her find
peace in the realm of dreams...it wasn't much at all, merely a simple
story, but Barnabas knew she needed his attention, and he was grateful
that she didn't have to suffer alone. Before he finished the story,
Sarah fell asleep--tucking her teddy bear in beside her and kissing her
goodnight, Barnabas crossed the room and blew out the candles; he never
realized that he had awakened her until her plaintive voice reached him
through the darkness, asking the one question he knew he could answer with complete certainty.
"Barnabas, we'll be best friends forever and always won't we?"
"Of course we will Sarah, nobody will ever come between us. I promise
you I'll always be here for you."
"I know you will. Goodnight Barnabas, I love you."
"Goodnight Sarah, I love you too."
As Barnabas left the room, he felt more at peace with himself than he
had in months. For all the grief that came with being a Collins, Sarah's
love was a gift from God, one that had a profound affect on him. He knew
that he wouldn't be able to help his parents--they had rejected his love
and sympathy--but he had been close to Sarah since the day she was born.
There was nothing he wouldn't do for her, and he vowed that he would do
his best to always protect and love her.
Turning back one last time, Barnabas watched until Sarah had fallen
asleep once more and was startled to find that, when he left, he had
been so touched by her innocent words that he had begun to cry.
"I'll be here for you forever and always, my darling sister. I promise you that."
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